


parasite from the outside.

by orphan_account



Category: Everyman HYBRID, Tribe Twelve
Genre: Alternate Universe, Different universe same suffering, Horror movie mistakes: the fanfic, M/M, Skinwalker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-11-15 17:37:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11235927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "But that stuff's not actually... real, right?" Alex seated himself on the floor, stretching himself awkwardly over the arm of the couch as all available space on the cushions themselves was occupied. "Like, creepypasta or whatever. I know they're just stories but these guys in my class did that Three Kings ritual awhile ago and theysworeit actually worked..."Evan laughed, cutting in to answer before Jeff could get the chance to. "No, kid, mirror rituals aren't fucking real. Ghosts aren't real, zombies (unfortunately) aren't real, and buying old Sega games at garage sales won't get you spirited away. People who believe in this shit are just really fucking--" He stopped midsentence, silently interrupted by Noah glaring from beside him. "Sorry, let me amend that. With apologies to the late Milo Asher,mostpeople who believe in this shit are just really fucking deluded. So, if you were worried about venturing out into the woods tomorrow, rest assured that the scariest thing that'll happen is Vinny not being able to stream his fucking anime in HQ."[scene cuts, Always Sunny music plays with the caption "The Gang Encounters a Skinwalker."]





	parasite from the outside.

**Author's Note:**

> This came about because I'm lowkey obsessed with skinwalkers and I was reading a skinwalker thread and noticed the default photo people tend to use as an example of their natural form is that one picture of the rake... You know the one that everyone (including the EMH wiki?) uses. So I thought... what if... the rake was actually a skinwalker... 
> 
> Originally I was going to just add to its canon powers and kinda switch canon around a little to accommodate it but after working it out in my head it turned up as a full AU so I went with that... Or maybe I'm just shameless and wanted an excuse to have Noah be the main character. :) It's anybody's guess.
> 
> This part really isn't all that interesting, but just think of it as the first 20 minutes of a horror movie because that's basically what it is--

The sun was already mid-descent when the taxi crawled slowly to a complete stop; the driver was grumbling incoherently to himself as he looked from the GPS on the dashboard to the house they’d just pulled up in front of and back again, clearly put out by having to drive some college kid on spring break into a neighborhood that was essentially in the middle of goddamn nowhere. Such _commendable_ customer service, but then again… This _was_ New fucking Jersey.

At least the surroundings were all kinds of aesthetically pleasing; the sun had sunk just low enough now that it had reached the point where the tired orange glow seeped just perfectly through the gaps in the brittle upper tree branches and backlit the still sparse collection of newly formed spring leaves. Afraid that he’d miss such a perfect shot by the time he was able to actually exit the car, Noah Maxwell grabbed for his camera and panned slowly from one end of the taxi window to the other, capturing as much of the scene as he could. Far from perfect, what with the dirtiness of the window and the irritated mumbling coming from the front seat, but well… That’s what editing was for.

“Yeah, this looks like it,” the taxi driver addressed him from the front seat. Immediately, Noah collected his bags (just two, and one was for the camera, which he opted to leave out for now for documenting purposes), paid the guy with a quick “thanks” that was equal parts awkward and sarcastic, and got the fuck out of that taxi, immersing himself in the clear evening air. Stepping onto the sidewalk, he paused to get a clearer shot of the captivating scenery (after the screech of wheels on pavement behind him had sufficiently faded) and then approached the house before him with only slight trepidation.

He filmed the house for only a brief few seconds, not wanting to, you know, be a creeper, especially if the taxi driver had in fact fucked up and he was standing in front of a total stranger’s home, by himself, in the middle of fucking nowhere. Which, honestly, considering how shitty his life had become over the course of the last year or so, wouldn’t be all that surprising. 

The sound of the doorbell seemed magnified to a ridiculous extent when played over the serene silence that seemed to cloak this small neighborhood, so much so that it seemed to echo far longer than it should have, even after the clearly audible (and almost as loud) sound of at least one pair of footsteps running to answer the door had overlapped it, seeming to fade only when the door was practically thrown open with a gratuitous amount of enthusiasm. 

The culprit, as it turned out, was a very excitable looking girl, with eyes bright enough to match her smile and dark brown hair pulled back in pigtails, fringe bangs neatly covering her forehead. Noah’s heart sank as he came to the extremely unfortunate conclusion that yes, he must have somehow ended up in the wrong location. On the bright side, though, he probably hadn’t found himself helpless and standing on the front porch of a serial killer. …Then again, looks could be deceiving. 

He lowered the camera, figuring this young lady probably didn’t want a random stranger filming her, and mumbled a satisfactorily polite, “I’m uh… sorry, but I think I may have gotten the wrong house. I’m looking for my friend and—“

Before he could even think about ending said sentence, though, she threw her hands in the air, only adding to the cheerful energy radiating from her in waves. “Oh my god, are you Noah?!” 

Thoroughly confused now, he nodded slowly. “Um… Yes?” 

She waved zealously, smile never faltering for a second. “I’m Jessie! I’m Evan’s friend, but he went upstairs and so I got to the doorbell before him and I thought I’d take the opportunity to meet you first! …And also maybe embarrass Evan.” Jessie winked at him, and Noah couldn’t help laughing; she had a certain charm to her, and he liked her already. 

“You’re actually really cute! Like, much cuter than I thought you’d be… No offense! That’s not an offense to you personally, I swear, I just thought that the likelihood of Evan of all people meeting someone cute that’s willing to come to _visit_ him…” She giggled.

Before Noah could formulate a response (and what was he supposed to even _say_ to that, anyway, “thanks”?) the sound of more footsteps approaching the door at a moderate speed made Jessie look over her shoulder before calling out to the newcomer. “Vinny, Vinny! C’mere, Evan’s OKCupid date is here! He’s definitely out of Evan’s league though, come say hi!”

The new arrival, Vinny, shuffled up to door with about half the energy Jessie had displayed, but with a smile to rival hers despite this. He was tall, taller than Noah at least, with short, dark hair and a well-kept beard/mustache combo. A pair of black-rimmed glasses rested on the bridge of his nose, and there was something about him, too, that Noah found instantly likeable somehow. 

“Noah, right? The film major kid from Florida?” He stuck out his hand and Noah shook it, not without noting how strong of a grip his new acquaintance had. “Vincent, though Vinny or Vince is preferred. Evan talks about you quite a bit, but the uh, OKCupid piece is new to me…” 

Jessie immediately started laughing, and Noah, too, laughed a little, although the sound of it was laced with awkwardness. “We uh… Didn’t meet on OKCupid.” 

Vinny’s grin only widened. “Plenty Of Fish, then? …Or, what’s that one for gay dudes? Grindr?” 

Pretending to roll her eyes, Jessie gave her friend a light, affectionate punch on the arm. “Grindr is for _hookups_ , Vincent.” She turned her gaze on Noah, and crossed her arms, repeating the overdramatic eyeroll. “I swear to god, straight men think they know everything. No one who looks like Noah would bother flying all the way up north just for a hookup.”

Considering this as if the present conversation was both logical and serious, Vinny nodded after a moment’s thought. “Especially not to hook up with somebody like Evan.” 

Finally, a third person joined this crowded huddle in front of the still-open front door. “What the fuck is going on here?! I’m gonna fucking kill you, Vinny…” The latest addition, who had clearly slid on his socks across the wood floor, gracefully came to a halt by grabbing onto Vinny’s upper arm, which he then proceeded to punch once he’d come to steady stop. 

Vinny just shrugged, rubbing his arm, as though Evan had greatly misjudged the amount of force behind the hit. “It’s your own fault for not bothering to get the door when it rang… Jesus, what’s with everybody punching me today?” 

Ignoring him, Evan ducked under his outstretched arm, stepping around one of Jessie’s feet and turned his attention to Noah, who couldn’t help but beam embarrassingly as he was united with what had been his only real friend for the past year and a half for the first time. “Hey, Evan,” he said, trying to sound casual as he lifted his camera again, unable to keep himself from capturing the moment, as cheesy as it felt to do so. You never knew when someone would be snatched from your life without notice, forever, so you had to keep a strong hold on what you _did_ have, before it was too late. He’d already made that mistake once, and the stinging regret kept him up at night far more often than he’d like to admit. Never again. 

Evan flipped off the camera obnoxiously and then looked at Noah (well, behind the lens), smiling genuinely. It was identical, of course, to the smiles that Noah had seen on video chat multiple times, and yet _different_ somehow, like seeing the subject of a faded black and white photograph in full, vibrant color for the first time. 

“Get the fuck inside; I’m sorry my asshole friends didn’t think to invite you in. Especially since, you know, you have that thin, weak southern blood that makes you helpless against a crisp, northern spring evening like tonight.” As Noah stepped inside, shutting the door behind him, Evan squinted his eyes, getting a closer look. “Actually, shit, you look really goddamn skinny in person, you just _might’ve_ frozen to death. Jesus, don’t you ever, y’know, eat?”

Noah lowered the camera calmly, looking at his friend with a completely stoic look on his face. “Well, I didn’t realize you were this fucking _short_ , so I guess we both ended up equally surprised.” He shrugged, pointing the camera lens at Evan’s feet and then slowly panning upwards, as if to affirm the full extent to which his friend was vertically challenged. 

“I’m almost as tall as him,” Jessie cut in with a mischievous grin, sidestepping both Vinny and Evan in order to successfully obstruct the latter from shoving Noah into a nearby wall. “If I wear heels, I’m totally taller than him and he hates it. That’s probably why we broke up.” 

Behind the lens, Noah’s eyes widened – Evan had told him about Jessie before, of course, and he’d known they were close, but nothing romantic had ever been mentioned. He glanced at the picture of the two of them captured on the small LCD screen; the image showed Evan wrapping Jessie in an affectionate embrace from behind as he attempted to wax poetic about not needing a label in order to love her with all his heart. Huh. Officially dating anymore or not, they really _did_ look pretty cute together. 

“C’mon, just put all your shit at the bottom of the stairs and follow me to the living room,” Evan tugged on Noah’s sleeve, forcing him out of his thoughts. “Jeff’s probably still in there, because he’s an impolite fucker who doesn’t care about making a good first impression or something. Alex gets a pass because he’s still a kid.”

Noah knew who Jeff was – aside from Vinny, he was the friend that Evan talked about the most, and Noah was just slightly nervous to meet him because of some of the things he’d been told. As for Alex, the name sounded familiar, but he couldn’t attach it to any specific person Evan had described to him before. Truthfully, he silently admitted to himself has he pushed his duffel bag neatly against the wall beside the stairs, he already felt a bit in over his head – Evan had more friends in this house right now than Noah had, period, and aside from classes, he couldn’t remember the last time he was in close proximity with this many people. 

Vinny and Jessie ran off to the kitchen as Noah followed Evan into the living room, which was surprisingly clean (from the glimpses he’d seen of Evan’s bedroom out of the corners of his Skype screen, he’d expected the whole house to be somewhere in the middle ground between respectable untidiness and hoarding nightmare), not to mention boasted a well-lit and generally welcoming and friendly atmosphere.

Well, as long as you managed to ignore the impressively prolific collection of hunting knives that were carefully laid out on the otherwise unassuming coffee table. If he hadn’t already known Evan well enough to know he was (relatively) harmless, this grisly display of what easily could be Jeffrey Dahmer’s User-Friendly Kitchen Set™ would have definitely unsettled him, but he did so it didn’t.

…Okay, maybe he was a tiny bit unsettled. 

Evan sat down (well, moreso just fell backward) onto the cushion in the center of the couch, and picked up one of the smaller knives, pointing it obnoxiously at a boy in a striped hoodie and beanie seated cross-legged on the floor, eyes glued to the Macbook on his lap. “Jeff, Noah. Noah, Jeff. You can try to talk to him but he’s not the best fucking conversationalist these days.” 

“Don’t point the knife at me, Evan,” Jeff replied with surprising promptness, somehow knowing about aforementioned knife despite his eyes and his head remaining locked in place. 

Ignoring Evan’s grumbling in the background about who-the-fuck-knows-what, Noah approached Jeff, switching his camera off of standby mode and beginning to record without even realizing he was doing so. “It’s uh, nice to meet you, dude.” He paused, but Jeff said nothing, and he was suddenly aware of the fact that he was recording this. “Sorry, I should’ve asked… Is it alright if I film? If not, it’s totally fine.” He hadn’t really bothered to ask Jessie or Vinny, but he felt the overwhelming need to, in this moment, if only because he was certain that if somebody started videotaping him earlier on in his mourning, he would have (attempted to) beat the shit out of them.

“S’fine,” Jeff mumbled in response, and finally looked up and over the laptop screen, in Noah’s general direction. “What kind of camera is that?” 

With a relieved smile, Noah lowered it, holding it out to Jeff. “You can look at it if you want; I don’t care. I have a much better one for classes, but I wasn’t gonna risk bringing it, since it’s technically a rental so if it breaks I’m fucked.” 

Jeff took the camcorder, holding it carefully and examining it. When he saw that the recording light was still on, he pointed it at Noah first, and then upwards toward where Evan was reclined on the couch. “It’s not bad! The picture’s alright; I have one that’s similar, but probably a little bit newer.” He handed it back with just as much care.

“Ah, yeah, I’ve had this one since high school.” Noah shrugged. “You film…?” He couldn’t recall Evan mentioning this, and it was definitely something he would have remembered.

Jeff nodded. “Yeah.” As soon as he said the word, though, he broke eye contact, looking down at the floor. “Well, I mean… I used to.”

It was a fairly cryptic statement, but Noah understood the underlying meaning immediately. Such a harrowing loss would definitely rob the world of its resplendence, at least temporarily, and without any splendor, what was there to capture but a desolate abyss where the world used to be? 

“Yeah I… Stopped for awhile too.” Wanting to offer his condolences in a way that wasn’t overstepping any boundaries, he too, offered his reply with equal ambiguity. “But inspiration always comes back.”

Despite not offering a verbal response, Jeff looked right at him for a number of seconds, a calm pensiveness projected behind his eyes, however slight and fleeting it appeared to be. There was nothing in the gaze betraying any solid emotion, be it positive or negative, and yet it was still fulfilling somehow, in a way that Noah couldn’t help but find reassuring; even the tiniest bit of mutual understanding and respect for each other was enough for him.

Presumably out of a need to change the subject, Jeff chose that moment to get to his feet, grasping at the wall for leverage (perhaps needing the support due to his legs going numb from being seated in the same position for an extended period of time) and carefully closed his laptop, looking toward the coffee table that was currently cluttered with knives with a roll of his eyes, deciding to set it gingerly down in the corner of the room where no one would be apt to step on it. “Where the hell’s Alex? It’s been like twenty minutes since he left the room to answer his phone.” 

Evan shrugged. “Dunno why you’re asking me; last I checked, I wasn’t in charge of him. He better not be in my fucking room, though.” Jeff glanced over his shoulder, giving Evan yet another _I am completely and utterly done with your shit_ look before exiting the room, disappearing around a corner and into a section of the house that Noah wasn't yet familiar with. 

“And you, come sit with me,” Evan lifted himself off the couch just enough to yank obnoxiously on Noah’s shirt by the back hem of its neckline. “Have we even had like, a proper fucking conversation since you walked in the door to my house. I don’t think so, and that’s pretty fucked up.”

With an over-exaggerated sigh, Noah allowed himself to be half-dragged backwards, stumbling over the heels of his feet before collapsing directly next to his best friend onto the visibly faded navy-blue cushions, which turned out to be noticeably more comfortable than they looked. “S’not my fault though.” He shrugged dismissively, or at least attempted to (it wasn’t an easy feat when they were practically shoulder to shoulder). “I’ve been surrounded by complete and utter chaos since I was first greeted at your front door by two of your unique and lovely friends--” He paused as this statement was affirmed by a loud crash in the kitchen, followed by a shocked yelp (Jessie) and a bout of sheepish laughter (definitely Vinny). “...both of whom seem to think that we’re... together or something.”   
   
Evan shifted positions, stretching himself across Noah’s legs and yelling in the direction of the apparent pandemonium. “If you assholes fucking break anything, you’re paying for it!” Resituating himself, he glanced at Noah, the look in his eyes unreadable. “They’re just fucking with you, dude; I think you’ve been shut in for too long and forgotten how the dynamics of friend groups work.”   
   
Unable to make the tough choice of whether to kick Evan or just flip him off, Noah opted for both, landing a surprisingly effective kick to the kneecap, leading to Evan grabbing one of the knives on the table and pointing it at him, a totally-facetious-yet-somehow-still-intimidating lust for violence in his eyes. Noah froze instinctively, raising the only thing he currently had on his person -- his camera. Evan just laughed mockingly, but hey - at least that was a cool shot. Vaguely, Noah wondered what his Video Production professor would think about an amateur slasher film.   
   
Just as he’d been about to put the knife back down, Evan paused, looking back at the camera (or, through the camera and at Noah, one of the two). “I forgot to tell you this, but it’s important so listen the fuck up -- you can fuck around in my house all you want, I don’t care if you spill shit and since you’re a guest I won’t make you pay me if you break anything… maybe. But don’t touch my fucking knives, got it? Don’t even fucking think about--”  
   
So of course Noah reached out and grabbed one at random, holding it up to the camera and examining it, if only because being told so explicitly _not_ to had made the action impossible to resist. “What the fuck, did you not just hear what I said I swear to god I will fucking stab you, Noah Maxwell--”  
   
Ignoring Evan’s more than empty threats, Noah looked at the grip of the knife curiously, then the serrated metal of the blade. “I’m pretty sure you’ve fucking shown this one off to me on camera before, it looks totally familiar.” He extended his arm, holding it at a distance to get a good look from a farther perspective. “Yep, I’m a hundred percent sure. It looks a lot bigger in front of my face than it did on webcam, though.”  
   
Grinning, Evan snatched the knife back now that it was manageably within his reach, and deposited it safely on the table with its brethren. “Man, I wish all the other dates I met online had the same thing to say once they met me in person.” 

Noah was saved from having to even consider dignifying that with a response by the sudden and very much welcome return of Vinny and Jessie, both weighed down with arms filled with snack foods of varying degrees of unhealthiness. “It took you that long just to _collect_ all that shit?” Evan eyed his two friends with faux disdain. “I figured you were, I don’t know, cooking something, baking a fucking cake or some shit.”

Side-eyeing the Designated Knife Table judgmentally, Vinny just tossed his collected loot into a haphazard pile at the foot of the couch where it seemed to be acceptably within everybody’s reach, with Jessie following suit. “Actually, it took us this long just to _find_ shit. Sometimes I forget how abysmally nonexistent your organizational skills are. Beer is essential, and honestly how was I supposed to know it’d be buried under like seven bags of goddamn _marshmallows_? Who _needs_ that many marshmallows?” As he leaned down once more to carefully place the twelve-pack of beer he’d been holding beside the formidable junk food mountain, he shot Noah an impressive imitation of a regretful glance. “There’s a reason we normally congregate at my place.” With that, he seated himself beside Evan, getting comfortable at the far end of the couch. 

Jessie, too, gingerly dropped the twelve-pack in her hand neatly next to the other one, and eyed the couch reproachfully. “Since nobody here apparently knows how to be a respectable gentleman, I’ll just have to improvise.” In a maneuver that was surprisingly both fluid and graceful, she somehow managed to wedge herself between Vinny and Evan, fitting, somehow, decently on what was clearly _not_ meant to be a four-person couch. “Well damn, that worked a lot better than I expected.” 

Laughing, Evan pointed accusingly at Noah beside him, almost jabbing a finger in his eye socket due to extremely limited personal space. “I blame this motherfucker for being so fucking small.”

“Yeah, what’s your secret?” Jessie asked, the punctuating giggle giving away that her question wasn’t at all serious. 

“Crippling depression,” Noah answered with a casual shrug, fighting to bite back laughter. The awkward silence that followed was almost instantaneous in its descent, cloaking the room in immediate discomfort. After what felt quite a bit longer but was probably only a few seconds worth of time, he decided they had suffered enough and let the laughter escape with a lighthearted shake of his head. “I’m fucking joking, sorry.” After a pause, he added, “well, I mean, it’s the _truth_ , but if I can laugh about it, so can you.” 

Joining the laughter now, Jessie tossed a pillow at him, something he really had no qualms about, since a) at least it wasn’t a knife, b) it made him feel like he was starting to really mesh with this friend group, and c) her aim was pretty dreadful and it ended up hitting Evan instead. So, yeah, definitely not much to complain about.

Evan was reaching to retrieve said pillow (prompting Noah to brace himself for an all-out pillow war) when Jeff made his reappearance, another boy following close behind; Noah assumed that must be Alex, as the two of them did indeed share a resemblance in facial features. 

“Where the hell were you two?” Evan demanded, letting the now seemingly forgotten pillow drop to the floor. “And I swear to god, if you say you fucking got lost because my house is such a mess, I might actually have to punch you. …And by ‘you’ I mean Jeff, because I’m not about to beat up a kid.” 

Alex made a face at the kid comment, but said nothing, and Jeff sighed, sounding more than a little exhausted despite the night still being young. “I found him on the phone with a girl; that’s why he stepped out for so long.”

Immediately, both Evan and Vinny started laughing, followed by Evan looking at Alex and applauding. Noticing the reproachful look on Jeff’s face, he rolled his eyes. “Come on, Jeff, he’s almost fucking seventeen years old, I doubt this is the first girl and it’s sure as hell not gonna be the last. I guarantee you, he’s gonna keep talking to her whether you approve or not, so just tone down the overprotectiveness and fucking chill out, maybe.”

“Well, for starters, don’t fucking try and parent my brother for me, because you have absolutely no idea what we’ve been through, but that being said… Yes, I know, you’re right. Everything just feels so fucking complicated right now.” With another sigh, he reclaimed his previous spot on the floor, although this time opting to leave his laptop closed beside him (at least for the time being). “Vinny, hand me a beer, would you?” 

Alex crumpled to the ground beside Jeff, leaning his back against the foot of the couch, at Vinny’s feet. “Can I have one…?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I guess so.” Jeff shrugged, glancing at his younger brother with a look that was seemingly unreadable to anyone but the two of them. “But just one, to start.” 

As Vinny started opening and handing out drinks, Evan put his arm around Noah, grinning at him knowingly. “Good thing Jeff said yes, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to, in good conscience, allow you to drink underage either. Fair’s fair.” 

“When have you ever done _anything_ in good conscience,” Noah grumbled under his breath, half-heartedly trying to shrug Evan’s arm away from him, more out of desire to make a point and keep up appearances than any actual objection to the friendly affection. 

“…isn’t he just adorable?” Evan, though still embracing Noah, addressed the rest of the room. “Like a puppy or something, you just want to squeeze him and pet his head, but you also really want him to just shut the fuck up.” 

From the floor, Jeff piped in. “Well, if this means Noah is replacing me as the one that you call ‘cute’ all the time, then sure, okay. But right now, I mostly just want _you_ to shut the fuck up.”

“…and that’s exactly why Noah is cuter than you,” Evan shot back. “Either way, cheers to, uh…” He lifted the bottle in his hand. “To whatever the fuck point I was just trying to make. I kinda lost it somewhere along the way, but who fucking cares because I won the argument regardless.” 

Unable to argue with that nonlogic, Noah just silently offered his assent by taking a generous gulp of beer.

* * *

Somewhere around the fourth beer (or was it three and a half? He could have sworn Evan had just started drinking out of one of Noah’s open bottles at one point, but whatever), Noah started to get decently tipsy. He’d always been kind of a lightweight, and it was probably magnified by lack of sleep and the fact that all he’d eaten today was half a bag of those miniature Chips Ahoy cookies (the other half of which he’d thrown in the general direction of the television screen during a particularly intense round of Mario Kart… it had seemed like a good idea in the moment…). 

Now that aforementioned Mario Kart tournament had reached its conclusion (that is, Vinny/Yoshi 8 wins, Alex/Donkey Kong 4 wins, Evan/Bowser 2 wins, Jessie/Toadette 1 win, and Jeff/Luigi and Noah/Koopa at a regrettable no wins), Noah was seated on the couch half-watching the new game that was in progress between Vinny and Evan (some sort of Kirby title he hadn’t gotten the chance to play yet) and half just _existing_ , enjoying just sitting there and taking in the atmosphere. 

The warm light softly illuminating the room ironically made him feel a little sleepy, but more than anything it just felt _homey_. He could relax here, physically _and_ mentally, which was saying a lot considering he spent the entirety of his day-to-day life in a state that was the complete antithesis of relaxed. How much of it was the alcohol, how much was the soft lighting, the unassuming pale blue color of the walls, and the cool glow of moonlight peeking through the windows and contrasting with the warmth of the lamps, and how much was the company he was surrounded with he didn’t know, but what he _did_ know was that right then, in that moment, he had no desire to return home. 

The sudden, loud crashing sound of someone tossing one of the game controllers to the ground made him look up suddenly, just in time to see Evan shuffling toward the couch and sitting down beside him, a look of disgruntled defeat on his face. “I swear, Vinny, fucking cheats.” 

“No I don’t!” Vinny answered in a singsong voice. “You’re just a sore loser, and you’re lucky you didn’t break your controller, dumbass.” He picked it up off the floor, setting it carefully down in its place beside the TV. “I’m such a good friend.”

Evan rolled his eyes, turning to Noah instead. “And what the fuck’s up with you; you’ve been sitting here silently with this vacant stare in your eyes and it’s a little fucking creepy.” 

The way he was smiling made Noah certain he was joking, but he kicked his friend squarely in the shin anyways, you know, because better safe than sorry. “I was just lost in thought, thinking about how much I like it here.”

 _Now_ any trace of derision in Evan’s smile was gone; it softened at the edges almost immediately, only adding to the infectious warmth in the room. “Well… Don’t get too used to it, because we’re leaving tomorrow, remember? Camping adventure? Wait until you see actual dense forest areas with your own two eyes… Three if the camera counts as another eye, I guess.”

“…You know we _have_ woods in Florida, right.” Noah couldn’t tell if he was incredulous or amused beyond belief, but either way such an insinuation was completely ridiculous. “Please tell me you don’t think the entire state is just Disney World, swamps, and alligators. Please, Evan, please restore my faith in you.”

Reclining on the couch, Evan paused as if giving the matter at hand serious consideration. “I don’t know, man, I’m kinda losing faith in _you_ for daring to crush my dreams like this. I couldn’t give a fraction of a fuck about Disney World, but if I ever visit you and I don’t even see a single alligator, that could very well be one of the greatest let-downs in my lifetime.” 

“Fine then,” Noah folded his arms, trying to give-off a believable imitation of looking put-out. “From now on, I choose to believe that New Jersey is nothing but orange-fake-tanned people and Wawa’s, and I refuse to let this image be shaken.”

“I don’t know, that seems like kind of an accurate assessment, though,” Vinny offered as he reclaimed his seat on the sofa. Evan nodded, silently concurring. What followed was a (far more in-depth than it should have been) discussion of states’ stereotypes between the two of them, one which Noah, in his somewhat drunken state, did not possess the attention span to follow. 

Instead, he ended up back on the floor where both Jeff and Alex were seated – together, but not so much making an effort to converse, seeing as they appeared to be preoccupied with laptop and phone, respectively. Jeff, however, seem to be in marginally better spirits than before, which was nice to see (as Noah not only empathized with his situation, but was beginning to find him genuinely likable), even if it was just the effects of the alcohol. 

Glancing over his shoulder and noticing Noah, Jeff lifted a hand to wave with a casual “oh, hey.” Noah reciprocated the greeting, prompting Jeff to adjust his position a little so they were side-by-side, making the laptop’s screen visible to Noah. He didn’t want to be rude or intrusive, so he pointedly went out of his way not to look; the only thing he took away from his brief glimpse was that Jeff was currently on Facebook… Probably. Social media sites tended to blur together in his head these days, since he really couldn’t bring himself to use them anymore, but it _looked_ like Facebook, in any case. 

“This one’s probably my favorite,” Jeff said, breaking the silence; the abruptness of which caused Noah to look up suddenly, only to find that Jeff had turned the laptop at a slight angle, an unspoken invitation to look. Displayed onscreen was a high-quality photo with a girl named Jessa tagged, clearly taken outdoors, of Jeff and a very pretty girl with black hair that almost shined blue under the rays of the bright sun, tied back out of her face, and wearing one of those black stretchy henna chokers that had been so popular in the early 2000s. The shot was taken from above (probably a selfie) and she was hugging him tightly around the waist; both were smiling with a warm brilliance that rivaled that of the sunlight surrounding them in intensity. It made Noah smile, too. 

“You guys look perfect together,” he admitted after having sufficiently admired the photo in front of him, making sure to leave ‘look’ in the present tense, as he knew firsthand how deeply hearing the alternative could cut. “And that’s just from seeing one picture, so…” 

Now it was Jeff’s turn to smile. “Well I said it was my favorite, but that only extends to still photographs… Someday I’ll go through all the video footage, but I just… Can’t yet. Thanks, though.” 

Although he’d never actually ask, Noah found himself wondering what exactly Jessa’s fate had been, if only because he was hoping it was something low on the trauma scale, like an unfortunate accident. But Evan had only hinted at what had happened, and Noah wasn’t about to intrude on matters that, in the end, didn’t really concern him at all.

Instead, he reached into the pocket of his hoodie to retrieve his phone (after a few seconds of fumbling, because like hell if he honestly remembered, in his half-drunken state, where he put the damn thing) and unlocked it, searching through his photos app until he found a specific picture which in turn he showed to Jeff, turning the screen and holding it between the two of them. “This one’s my favorite, I guess.” It was, if only because he could remember the day it was taken perfectly, and it was one of the last happy, untainted memories of his cousin he had. The image, perfectly frozen in time now, showed Milo bent over the railing of a wooden structure, the lookout tower located offside of the boardwalk they’d spent so much time at, a shitty bic pen in hand as he tried to scratch something into the wood, to somehow leave an impression on the locality that had managed to leave such an impression on both of them. Noah had long since forgotten what it was that Milo had eventually chosen to write (draw?) as the subject of his amateur graffiti that afternoon, a fact which he regretted quite heavily, as the details were important in keeping Milo’s memory alive and he was nowhere near emotionally strong enough to go back to the boardwalk alone and find out, at least not yet.

“You look so happy,” Jeff noted, his tone lighthearted as he pointed to the screen where past-Noah had just finished jumping out from behind Milo, attempting to snap a picture of his cousin’s shocked expression, which of course had ended up being a massive failure; the look on Milo’s face was a reproachful smile, void of even a trace of surprise.

Noah nodded silently, switching his phone screen back off; the nostalgia was becoming a bit too much, but the camaraderie that had seemed to build between him and Jeff was worth it, or nearly so. Confiding in people had never been something that had come easy to him; it had always been the easier, and somehow safer, option to just suffer quietly alone. Milo and Evan had been the only ones he ever felt comfortable letting his guard down with, but this wasn’t bad… Well, it was bad that both of them had gone through something so terrible, but empathizing with each other was… Nice.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, simultaneously unsure and all too aware of all the things he was voicing his gratitude for.

Jeff only smiled.

* * *

Midnight found them all either squeezed like sardines on the couch or stretched out on the floor encircling it, sharing both a few more drinks and a plethora of interesting stories, most of which were varying degrees of both amusing and embarrassing. Regrettably, Noah’s camera had long since died and was now charging in the corner (he probably shouldn’t have wasted precious battery life filming Evan eating Twizzlers for fifteen minutes, but it had seemed like a sensible idea at the _time_ ) and therefore wasn’t able to permanently capture said stories, but that was okay because human memory could work just as well, in some cases.

Jessie was basking in the appreciative laughter that followed her anecdote involving her hilarious (well, that special anyone-who-laughs-at-this-is-certainly-going-straight-to-hell brand of hilarity, anyway) attempt to bring Evan along to her five-year-old nephew’s birthday party back when the two of them had still been dating. Needless to say, it had ended just as catastrophically as Noah would have predicted. 

“On that note…” Jessie turned to Noah once the both of them had settled down. “If you and Evan aren’t actually dating and didn’t meet on a hookup site or whatever, how the hell _did_ you meet?” 

In perfect unison, both Noah _and_ Evan started laughing again, despite only having just finished. Honestly, Noah thought it was strange that what was, in reality, a pretty mundane story was such a fucking _mystery_ to everybody. And, for that matter, why didn’t they already know? Evan had thought it appropriate to share the fact that Jeff was mourning his dead girlfriend (after losing both of his parents no less) with Noah, but he hadn’t shared something as simple as their friendship origin story? Oh well, Evan was weird.

“It’s really not all that interesting, especially following a story like _that_ ,” he nodded to Jessie, “but just for the sake of clarification, sure, I’ll tell you.” He took a moment, putting himself in a nostalgic mindset once again, before beginning. “We met when I was in my last year of high school, right at the start of it, so… a year and a half ago, I guess. My cousin died when I was in 11th grade, so I was sad as fuck all the time and I didn’t really talk to anybody, and I completely avoided anything that reminded me of Milo. But on Halloween of my senior year I was drinking a little bit and was just like fuck it, and went on some creepypasta forum. Creepypasta was always one of Milo’s _things_ , I guess, like he used to try and freak me out when we were younger by telling me _Candle Cove_ was real and the Skintaker was actually going to come steal my skin, dumb shit like that. Then when I got older we both got into it and would share our favorites and try to scare each other… But, the first time I went looking for creepypasta on my own, without Milo, was when I met Evan. He made some pretentious fucking post about how all new-era creepypasta are shit and wish-fulfilment or whatever and I commented asking what he thought was actually good, then, and he linked me to r/nosleep on Reddit where I read this one story, where the OP was getting messages from unknown accounts and calls from unknown numbers; it was honestly pretty scary… Then I clicked back to the creepypasta forum, seeing that I had a new private message which made me flip the fuck out due to what I’d just read and of course it’s fucking Evan saying something like “I scared you didn’t I” and I told him to suck a dick and we ended up messaging all night. Which just built into a friendship I guess.” He shrugged. “That’s about it, really. We moved from the forum to Skype after awhile and then we started gaming together, too.”

Vinny looked first at Evan, then Noah. “No offense guys, but meeting on a goddamn creepypasta forum is arguably much, much more lame than just swiping right on each other or whatever the fuck you kids do to get laid these days… At least Noah had a respectable reason; I’m pretty sure Evan’s only excuse for being a grown-ass adult hanging out on a message board probably filled with thirteen-year-old scene girls is that he tries too hard to be edgy.”

“Listen!” Evan sat up straight on the couch, tucking his legs underneath him and kneeling so as to appear taller. “You of all people have no room to mock my nerdy hobbies; Jeff, maybe, but definitely not you! Creepypasta is cool, when it’s not complete shit that is. Go read _The Strangers_ before you waste my time with your misinformed opinion!” 

"But that stuff's not actually... real, right?" Alex seated himself on the floor, stretching himself awkwardly over the arm of the couch as all available space on the cushions themselves was occupied. "Like, creepypasta or whatever. I know they're just stories but these guys in my class did that Three Kings ritual awhile ago and they  _swore_  it actually worked..."

Evan laughed, cutting in to answer before Jeff could get the chance to. "No, kid, mirror rituals aren't fucking real. Ghosts aren't real, zombies (unfortunately) aren't real, and buying old Sega games at garage sales won't get you spirited away. People who believe in this shit are just really fucking--" He stopped midsentence, silently interrupted by Noah glaring from beside him. "Sorry, let me amend that. With apologies to the late Milo Asher,  _most_  people who believe in this shit are just really fucking deluded. So, if you were worried about venturing out into the woods tomorrow, rest assured that the scariest thing that'll happen is Vinny not being able to stream his fucking anime in HQ."

Jeff looked at him with just the vaguest hint of skepticism in his eyes. “You say that, but I bet you’re bringing that entire collection of knives with us.”

Rolling his eyes like an exasperated parent surrounded by wearisome children, Evan answered with a sigh. “No, Jeffrey, I’m bringing about half of them. And also, they’re hunting knives; aren’t they appropriate tools to bring out into the woods? You’ll be kissing my ass if we run across a fucking bear.”

“…I’ll keep that in mind.”

* * *

Noah wouldn’t have been able to give an answer if he’d been asked what time they’d all gone to bed – and really, it wasn’t so much “going to bed” as it was “just sort of passing out in any available space that’s decently human-sized” but he didn’t exactly have any complaints. 

He’d ended up on the floor parallel to the bottom of the couch, and although it was far from even being in the _realm_ of comfortable, he somehow found himself more relaxed and sleepy than he could remember being in quite a long time, despite the fact that his bed at home was the perfect levels of warmth and softness. The only reason why he was drifting in and out of consciousness instead of being deeply settled into REM rest was because he was pretty damn thirsty, but also too damn lazy to get up and look for water. Truly, a struggle.  
“Noah, Noah, hey Noah!” From up on the couch, Evan reached down and hit him on the head a few times – Noah was sure he hadn’t _intended_ for it to hurt, but this asshole obviously didn't know his own strength. “You awake?”

Disgruntled, he rolled over onto his back and looked up at his friend. “Well, even if I wasn’t, I fucking would be now. Why, what the hell’s your issue?”  
There was a pause, presumably as Evan thought of a passable excuse as to why he'd bothered Noah for no reason whatsoever. “I dunno; I just wanted to get your attention.” At Noah's aggravated sigh, he gave another attempt. “Hey, like, a year ago from now, would you've ever imagined we’d be hanging out in person? And sleeping beside each other, no less…”  
“Okay, that was about to be a really touching sentiment, but you made it weird and now I have nothing to say to you.” Noah finalized the statement by rolling back onto his side again, signaling that the conversation was indeed over. “This is gonna be a very long week, isn't it?”

Evan didn't bother to respond, so Noah was left to answer himself in his head. _Probably, but in the best possible way._

**Author's Note:**

> I know Jessie is a minor EMH character, but I added her because... Well, I wanted a female character and she seemed to fit better in my head than Jessa or Steph. Her canon experiences with the rake, mostly, and her friendship with Evan. (Plus she's my favorite female character shhhh. I couldn't believe no one had used a character tag for her before me; it made me sad!)
> 
> (Yes, I'm naming all my chapters with different horror movie titles. Yes, I stole it shamelessly from MTV Scream Season 2... It's just such a cool idea imo.)


End file.
